How to french kiss

French kissing is arguably the most intimate part of the courting ritual: You’re eyeball to eyeball, heart to heart, touching each other with a part of the body that’s filled with a million ultra-sensitive nerve endings. It’s an aphrodisiac as much for the mind and heart as it is for your other bits. Getting it right makes everything else—if the both of you agree there will be anything else—go much better. French kissing doesn’t have to lead to sex, of course; a good makeout session can be an exciting, intensely romantic experience all on its own. Here are a few tips to pucker up and get it right.

Find the Right Time to Kiss

The best time for a first kiss is when you’re alone, there’s a pause in the conversation, and you’re both looking into each other’s eyes. Help make this moment happen by getting away from the crowd to a place you both feel comfortable. Stand or sit close to your partner, make eye contact, and let the conversation come to a natural breaking point. You’ll both know when the moment is right.

Don't Obsess About Your Breath

Your breath doesn't need to be any more minty-fresh than your kissing partner's. (For instance, if you both just had dinner together and ate equally garlicky meals, you'll be fine.) Bring some mints or some gum with you, but don't pop them obsessively. It's not necessary, and it'll make you look over-eager.

Start With Your Lips

The first thing that comes to mind when you think about French kissing is probably your tongue, but that shouldn't come into play right away. You should ease into it and follow your partner's cues. Start just by lightly kissing the surface of the lips (either the top lip, the bottom lip, or both).

Don't Make Your Tongue the Star of the Show

A kiss without any tongue at all is perfectly fine. When you're ready to take it to the next level, open your mouth just a little wider and gently touch your tongue against your partner's. Let the tips of your tongues "play around" together. Don't do much more than that, though. One common rookie mistake is trying to stick your whole tongue down someone's throat. At the very least, you'll create an awkward moment; at the worst, you'll become an embarrassing story your partner tells for years. When it comes to tongue, a little goes a long way, and teasing can be very arousing.

Use Your Hands Wisely

The best spots to place your hands are along ​your partner's neck, jaw, or waist, or on the back of your partner's head. If you want to be extra-romantic, softly cup your partner's face. Using your hands while you kiss helps make things far more romantic, sensual, and tender. Never just leave them by your side; that's just awkward, and you're missing an opportunity to make your partner feel more than just your tongue.

Don't Forget to Breathe

Take regular breaks to pull away and look into your partner's eyes. It'll give you a chance to catch your breath, share a smile, and savor the moment. It'll also help slow things down a bit, and slower—as any good lover will attest—is sexier.

Mix It Up

Don't leave your lips or your tongue in the same spot for more than a couple of seconds. The initial excitement of a first kiss is thrilling, but things can get boring awfully quickly if you don't vary your style a little. Use your tongue to gently explore all the soft, sensuous places in your partner's mouth, but remember: Don't be overbearing, and don't open your mouth too widely.

When in Doubt, Follow Your Partner's Lead

You don’t need to be an expert on kissing to share a great kiss. If you’re not sure what to do, just go with the flow and let your partner take over. As long as the two of you like each other and are concentrating on the magic of the moment, it’ll go great.

It's OK to Laugh

You might be tempted to laugh or make a little joke to ease the tension or hide some of your nervousness. Go for it! Your partner is probably just as nervous as you are, and it'll ease the tension all the way around. On a purely physical level, kissing is rather funny, and sometimes, it's just best to acknowledge it.

Know When to End It

If this is your first time kissing this person, keep things brief. If you get this one right, there will be plenty more chances to kiss. You want to leave your partner dying to lock lips with you the next time.

French kissing is arguably the most intimate part of the courting ritual: You’re eyeball to eyeball, heart to heart, touching each other with a part of the body that’s filled with a million ultra-sensitive nerve endings. It’s an aphrodisiac as much for the mind and heart as it is for your other bits. Getting it right makes everything else—if the both of you agree there will be anything else—go much better. French kissing doesn’t have to lead to sex, of course; a good makeout session can be an exciting, intensely romantic experience all on its own. Here are a few tips to pucker up and get it right.

Find the Right Time to Kiss

The best time for a first kiss is when you’re alone, there’s a pause in the conversation, and you’re both looking into each other’s eyes. Help make this moment happen by getting away from the crowd to a place you both feel comfortable. Stand or sit close to your partner, make eye contact, and let the conversation come to a natural breaking point. You’ll both know when the moment is right.

Don't Obsess About Your Breath

Your breath doesn't need to be any more minty-fresh than your kissing partner's. (For instance, if you both just had dinner together and ate equally garlicky meals, you'll be fine.) Bring some mints or some gum with you, but don't pop them obsessively. It's not necessary, and it'll make you look over-eager.

Start With Your Lips

The first thing that comes to mind when you think about French kissing is probably your tongue, but that shouldn't come into play right away. You should ease into it and follow your partner's cues. Start just by lightly kissing the surface of the lips (either the top lip, the bottom lip, or both).

Don't Make Your Tongue the Star of the Show

A kiss without any tongue at all is perfectly fine. When you're ready to take it to the next level, open your mouth just a little wider and gently touch your tongue against your partner's. Let the tips of your tongues "play around" together. Don't do much more than that, though. One common rookie mistake is trying to stick your whole tongue down someone's throat. At the very least, you'll create an awkward moment; at the worst, you'll become an embarrassing story your partner tells for years. When it comes to tongue, a little goes a long way, and teasing can be very arousing.

Use Your Hands Wisely

The best spots to place your hands are along ​your partner's neck, jaw, or waist, or on the back of your partner's head. If you want to be extra-romantic, softly cup your partner's face. Using your hands while you kiss helps make things far more romantic, sensual, and tender. Never just leave them by your side; that's just awkward, and you're missing an opportunity to make your partner feel more than just your tongue.

Don't Forget to Breathe

Take regular breaks to pull away and look into your partner's eyes. It'll give you a chance to catch your breath, share a smile, and savor the moment. It'll also help slow things down a bit, and slower—as any good lover will attest—is sexier.

Mix It Up

Don't leave your lips or your tongue in the same spot for more than a couple of seconds. The initial excitement of a first kiss is thrilling, but things can get boring awfully quickly if you don't vary your style a little. Use your tongue to gently explore all the soft, sensuous places in your partner's mouth, but remember: Don't be overbearing, and don't open your mouth too widely.

When in Doubt, Follow Your Partner's Lead

You don’t need to be an expert on kissing to share a great kiss. If you’re not sure what to do, just go with the flow and let your partner take over. As long as the two of you like each other and are concentrating on the magic of the moment, it’ll go great.

It's OK to Laugh

You might be tempted to laugh or make a little joke to ease the tension or hide some of your nervousness. Go for it! Your partner is probably just as nervous as you are, and it'll ease the tension all the way around. On a purely physical level, kissing is rather funny, and sometimes, it's just best to acknowledge it.

Know When to End It

If this is your first time kissing this person, keep things brief. If you get this one right, there will be plenty more chances to kiss. You want to leave your partner dying to lock lips with you the next time.

From figuring out the right amount of tongue to use to remembering to breathe, there's a lot that goes into how to French kiss. Whether it's your first time or 1,000th French kissing is an art—you can always improve your technique. Whether your looking for a basic outline of how to French kiss or pro tips to take your make out game to the next level, we've compiled the ultimate guide to French kissing, with expert tips from sex therapists and dating experts.

Don't be afraid to make the first move. "We are all responsible for our own pleasure, and shouldn’t always wait for the other person to turn us on or kiss us," says Marissa Nelson, a certified sex and relationship therapist in Washington, DC. "Perhaps start off with a forehead kiss, and then a kiss on the tip of the nose—then go in for a kiss on the lips. Pull your love close to you by the waist and tell them how good their lips taste on your tongue."

It might seem obvious, but it still needs to be said: no one wants to French kiss someone with bad breath. "I can’t tell you how many couples privately complain about their partner's bad breath," says Nelson. To do your part, keep a pack of mints or a mini-bottle of mouthwash handy if you know you're going to be getting up close and personal.

If your partner is the bad breath culprit, Nelson suggests using the "sandwiching technique" to gently suggest a mint—first praise something you like about their kissing, then suggest a mint would make it even more enjoyable, and finally close with another compliment.

When it comes to french kissing, there's no need to rush. Rushing, actually, can do more harm than good. "Ease into it," says Claudia Six, Ph.D., a clinical sexologist and counselor in California. "Sometimes people are anxious and jump into the kiss. It's not smooth and it can get a awkward. Make sure it’s mutual and start with meaningful eye contact."

Nelson advises keeping your mouth relaxed, keeping your kisses soft and tender. "Kiss the top of the lips, the bottom of the lips, then graze your tongue between the lips and slowly add a little tongue," she says. "You can play and chase your partner's tongue for a couple of seconds and then suck on the top and bottom lip. When you start getting into the groove, you can increase the pressure and intensity."

Try not to overthink your kissing technique—that's the number one mistake most people make when their kissing, says Chris Donaghue, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and sexologist in California. "What makes French kissing good is being present but also being passionate," he says. " Just be in the moment. When you’re French kissing with someone you’re saying 'I have passion for you. I want to connect deeper. I want to build intimacy with you.' You’re trying to communicate to someone that you care about them; don’t be so obsessed with technique."

If you're paying attention to your partner, you pick up on things. If they're going slow and not using tongue yet, it's a signal to you to keep things slow and simple (for the moment). All along the way it's important to read their energy. "Make eye contact once in awhile and pay attention to what's happening," says Six. As passion builds and momentum increases, you can kiss them with more urgency.

French kissing all about passion, and that means using your tongue. But there's a fine line between the perfect amount of tongue and too much tongue. "It’s that really beautiful gray area where you're using tongue thereby making it more impactful and hot and sexier than just a closed mouth kiss or a peck on the cheek," says Donaghue. "But don’t overwhelm with thrusting and tongue power—it’s about a gentle use of your tongue to communicate interest or passion."

Don't leave your hands in your pocket or limp at your sides—use them. "Where your hands are communicates something," says Donaghue. "If your hands are wrapped around your partner that naturally adds another layer of passion and intensity."

Try running your fingers through your partner's hair, gently scraping your nails along their back and neck, holding their hand in yours, or cupping their face in your hands.

When most people think of kissing, they think of closed eyes but making eye contact before the kiss and during the kiss can make the experience more intimate.

"Unfortunately, the longer a couple is together the lazier they get about how much work they put into French kissing. They tend to think it doesn't matter as much, that it's not as needed," says Donaghue. "I think couples need to prioritize kissing more because that is one of the first things that diminishes. Sex will keep going, but kissing slows down and stops."

But for many couples, kissing can be more meaningful than sex. Keep prioritizing the good old-fashioned make out session, especially in long-term relationships.

Everyone kisses differently—all that matters is that you and your partner work together to make French kissing a positive experience for both parties. If you're not into something your partner is doing, let them know what you like and what turns you on—just avoid being critical. "Instead of saying 'You use too much tongue' or 'I don't like the way you kissed me,' it's better to say 'Hey, I love when people kiss me with a lot of tongue,' or 'I love when people use less tongue,' etc." says Donaghue.

How to french kiss

A truly amazing, off the wall, blockbuster movie-style kiss has enough power to make you dizzy and weak in the knees. Does that sound cheesy? Because I’m pretty convinced that cheesy sayings were born after people experienced a next-level make out session.

Kissing can be the best, seriously. There is almost nothing better than making out. Even when you get older, move into adulthood, and gain more experience with things other than kissing, it doesn’t lose its appeal.

Of course, kissing is an

and it takes time to perfect it. Trust me, we all have anxiety about being “bad” kissers, experienced or not, so if you’re feeling stressed, you are not alone.

The French Kiss is not something every single person can automatically do with no practice or tips. TBH, for the vast majority of us, putting a tongue in someone’s mouth is scary if you’ve never done it before (and even when you have).

You want to have that incredible, weak knees, dizzy kissing session, not a slobbery dog-like experience wherein someone is spitting all over you. You may have seen people kissing passionately in movies, and it may have looked impulsive and spur of the moment. In real life, you don't want to "just go for it." Be sure to always ask before you kiss someone so, you know both of you are sure this is something you want to do.

To get you started on your path to be a true make out champion, we asked a few seasoned maker-outers for their best suggestions.

Here are a few golden tips to perfect the French kiss.

Enthusiasm is important

Be passionate, and prescient, while simultaneously being able to fully enjoy the moment. it also really gives you a leg up if you love the person you're kissing. -Greg, 12 years of kissing experience.

Kissing is half technique, half bonafide excitement. You want to let the other person know that you are really enjoying the making out, but not too much, ya know? Don’t smash your face against your partner’s like you're trying to smoosh your faces together into one big face.

Or at least like them a whole lot!

Take a hint before you go full French

Never assume you have automatic consent (full stop) to force your tongue into someone else's mouth. Like all manner of foreplay, you should start with the basics before working your way up to speaking fluid French. And even then, it's not an inevitable destination; if your partner is pointedly not joining you part-way while you work your way through the French alphabet, take their cues and temper your passion accordingly. -Matt, 10 years of kissing experience.

So, you’re kissing someone and it’s going really well. Maybe you want to move into

? Don’t just go for it with a reckless abandon. Start by lightly touching your tongue on their lip. See if they’re into it. If they are, your partner will likely part their lips, or touch their tongue to yours. If you're not sure, always ask if it's OK. Remember, kissing doesn’t always mean tongue kissing.

When it comes to tongue: Less is more

Ease into it. Step one shouldn't be a deep dive into my throat. -Stacy, 15 years of kissing experience.

On that note, the last thing you want to do is aggressively snake into someone's mouth with your tongue. Take it slow. Feel it out. You may have seen intense, wild kissing like that in movies — but it rarely works out that way in real life (at least not right in the beginning).

Suck on the upper lip

You suck on the upper lip. It’s all about the upper lip! Like a gentle giant. -Malgosia, 10 years of kissing experience.

I’m not talking about stopping mid-kiss so you can spend a full five or six seconds sucking on your partner’s upper lip. That would obviously be weird. Instead, while you’re kissing gently, take a second, take your partner’s upper lip in your mouth just for a moment, suck it, and then go back to kissing. This doesn’t mean the full upper lip, just the cupid’s bow (the very tip of the upper lip).

If you’re making out for a long time, interludes such as this can add some fresh excitement.

Watch the jaw

Don't move your jaw to quickly or too slowly. Kissing is a conversation and it's important to get the rhythm down before you start going for any Guinness records. -Zack, 8 years of kissing experience.

Kissing is kind of a fluid motion. You go in, kiss a little, pull back for air a little, go in a little and so on. When you’re into it, try to keep the movements slow and even. You don’t have to go nuts with the motions, which can cause some jaw pain and be hella awkward.

Massage your partner’s tongue with yours

It’s a dance between your two tongues. Not a competition to see who can be the most forceful! -James, 9 years of kissing experience.

You don’t have to use your tongue through the entire make out session. If you want to just kiss without tongue too, it’s totally fine. When you ARE using tongue, your go-to move when Frenching can be a massage between your two tongues. You can also try different things and see what feels most comfortable.

Switch up the rhythm and keep me guessing. I love when guys stop and go and keep it playful – stops it from getting monotonous. -Gabby, 9 years of kissing experience.

Be gentle, be conscious of the cues the other person is giving you. If they pull their tongue away, maybe they just want to kiss without tongue for a while. That’s OK!

Try a light nibble of the lower lip (but not too much)

There is nothing I like more than when my boyfriend gently bites my lip. It’s playful and sexy. -Marie, 5 years of kissing experience.

This is very similar to the “upper lip” sucking tip, but instead it’s a light nibble on the bottom lip. This one takes some expertise. You do not want to go chomping down on your partner’s lip. Keep it light. It’s more like you’re grabbing your partner’s lip between your teeth, rather than biting. Try biting your own lower lip for practice.

Watch for teeth and slobber

Be careful, like, pulling away from each other because of the slobber. -Jess, 9 years of kissing experience.

What's the difference between "bise" and "bisou"?

  • Share
  • Flipboard
  • Email

Getty Images / Natasha Sioss

  • Vocabulary
  • Pronunciation & Conversation
  • Grammar
  • Resources For Teachers

French has a number of different words for "kiss," which, though not surprising for such a romantic language, can be confusing for French learners. The most common terms are bise and bisou, and while they are both informal with similar meanings and uses, they're not exactly the same.

Une bise is a kiss on the cheek, a gesture of friendship exchanged while saying hello and good-bye. It’s not romantic, so it can be used between friends and acquaintances of any gender combination, particularly two women and a woman and man. Two men are likely to say/write it only if they are family or very close friends. Bise is most commonly found in the expression faire la bise.

In the plural, bises is used when saying good-bye (e.g., Au revoir et bises à tous) and at the end of a personal letter: Bises, Grosses bises, Bises ensoleillées (from a friend in a sunny place), etc.

Again, bises is platonic. It does not mean that the letter writer is trying to take your relationship to the next level; it's basically shorthand for saying good-bye with the classic French cheek/air kiss: je te fais la bise.

Familiar spelling variation: biz

Un bisou is a warmer, more playful, and more familiar version of bise. It can refer to a kiss on the cheek or on the lips, so may be used when talking to lovers and platonic friends. Bisous can say good-bye to a good friend (A demain! Bisous à toute la famille) as well at the end of a letter: Bisous, Gros bisous, Bisous aux enfants, etc. When saying good-bye on the phone, friends sometimes repeat it several times: Bisous, bisous, bisous! Bisous, tchao, bisous!

Familiar abbreviation: bx

More French Kisses

Nouns

  • un baiser – kiss
  • un bécot (informal) – kiss, peck
  • un patin (informal) – French kiss, kiss with tongues
  • une pelle (informal) – French kiss
  • un smack – noisy kiss

Verbs

  • bécoter (informal) – to kiss, smooch
  • biser – to kiss
  • donner un baiser – to kiss
  • embrasser – to kiss
  • envoyer un baiser – to blow a kiss
  • envoyer un smack – to give a noisy kiss
  • faire une bise/un bisou – to kiss (usually on the cheek)
  • rouler un patin – to French kiss
  • rouler une pelle – to French kiss
  • sucer la poire/pomme – to kiss passionately, neck

Warning: As a noun it's perfectly acceptable, and it's ok to say baiser la main, but otherwise, do not use baiser as a verb! Though it originally meant "to kiss," it is now an informal way to say "to have sex."

How to french kiss

The first big step in the relationship is a kiss. It is an amazing feeling when you melt into your loved one thinking only about your partner. So how to make it remembered? We are going to introduce you with some useful tips about tongue kissing. In addition, we will explain how to understand she wants it too. French kissing methods for you and your girlfriend.

Nobody likes bitten dry lips, so y o u need to know that your lips is soft enough. So if you want your kiss feel fantastic, look after your lips and hands. By the way, dry lips can be a sign of dehydration. So not to let that happen drink more and motorize your lips. Do not worry if you look in the mirror before a date and see chapped lips, just use balm or lip cream. However, do not overdo it. Your partner should feel you not the makeup or cream. If you are about to kiss and you have no time to get ready, just lick your lips. This method also attracts girls because licking the lip can turn them on.

You need to have fresh breath even if you are not going to kiss in a minute. Brush your teeth take a chewing gum or Mentos. You better not to eat smelling foods like garlic, onion, pepper, and fish. Visit a restroom and use your menthol mints for a minute. Better, do not do it in front of the girl, it might seem too arrogant and put her off.

All the right kisses start with the look in the eyes. Just stand in front of her touch her face with your hand to get her attention and look deeply in her eyes. Then look down to her lips, then back to her eyes. This move will show her your intention. By the way, when we are into someone or something, our eye pupils enlarge. You can even bite your lower lip to show that you are ready for a kiss.

We all get nervous before the first kiss with new partner, but do not show it to her and do not forget to smile. If you are confident with yourself, your partner will gain that energy as well. It is especially nice to smile just before the kiss is finished to show your partner you liked it. However, make sure your smile look natural.

You need to break the ice between you and your partner. Little touches some hugs are the best way to do it. It is not easy to do, but it should be done before kissing. Touch the hand or remove lock of hair from her face. There are some especially sensitive places on a female body like hands, neck or back. You can stroke her hand or back in the resonant, gently touch her neck pretending to push back her hair or just hug her under her waist.

You feel it is a time to move your body closer to hers. Make the first move come a bit close and give her some time to do the same. Move her towards you slowly look at her eyes and give her a smile. Do everything slowly it increase the tension and passion of the intimate moment and give her opportunity to get used to each other.

Next step in a French kisses technique is to lean your heads slowly so you would not bump your noses. Touch her face and close your eyes when you feel your partner’s lips on your mouth.it is not very comfortable and romantic to kiss with your eyes open. You never know where the kiss will happen and you surely do not want to be destructed from it. So close your eyes to not to let anything ruin the magic of the moment. Open your mouth slightly to let your date’s tongue get inside it.

The first kiss should not be rough. You just getting to know each other so just touch her lips with you putting as much tenderness as you can. Act very slowly, because such kisses have much higher level of intimacy than quick ones.

The French kiss is more passionate and takes you to the next level. You have to be gentle and passionate but not aggressive. Move forward and open your mouth a little wider. Stroke her tongue with yours gently. You have to feel if your partner responds to your and answers to the kiss. If she likes it, she will allow you to continue. If not — she can even move her head to stop. Do not be disappointed, she might be not into French kiss or just thinks it is not the right place for it. You must patient and just wait until the next time.

It feels amazing to kiss someone like that. It is a culmination when both of you cannot wait and get more intimate. But you must understand it is the right time. Look at the sings to understand it.

French kiss is very intimate and you need to make sure you are in the right place. You must be alone.

Only in private atmosphere, you can take your time and enjoy each other. Both of you have to be happy, calm and in a romantic mood.

Your partner is trying to get closer to you, touching you face or hands biting her lip, looking at your eyes. Maybe, there will be an awkward situation when you do not know what to talk about anymore because you want to kiss and not to talk and the level of tension is extremely high.

Your date is about to end and you want her to think about you for the rest of the night. You can kiss her when you accompanied her to the house. It feels just right to move this far with no explanation why.

Follow these tips, but also follow your heart and body to lead you on and get some experience!

You will never get a second chance at making a great first impression, and the art of French kissing is one of those life experiences that you want to get right the first time. French kissing can be a lot of fun if it's done correctly; but get it wrong, and it could be a relationship turn off. French kissing correctly begins with the knowledge of step by step instructions from those that have mastered the art of French kissing.

How to French Kiss Step by Step

Preparation

Successful French kissing begins with proper oral hygiene and a bit of planning. Be careful what you eat. Obvious turn-offs such as onions, garlic, and tuna are not wise choices, but other food items such as alcohol, cheese, and spicy foods, can also make your mouth a no go zone. Whenever possible, keep a travel toothbrush or a breath mint with you, you're going to want to make sure that your breath is fresh before you begin planting the passionate kiss.

Find the Right Angle

When you are ready, lean in to your partner at an angle that avoids any collision with your nose. You will also want to angle your head back to avoid bumping heads. Begin this step going in while gazing deeply into your partner's eyes, and close them as you lean in for the kiss.

Moisturize and Start Slow

Before your lips meet for the first time, take a moment to lick your lips to moisturize them. Start out slowly placing tiny kisses beginning at the corner, and working them to the center of your partner's lips. You will want to control the closed mouth kiss, enjoying the friction of your lips against your partner's while building up passion for the open mouth French kiss. Make sure your heads are in a comfortable position before moving on to the next step.

Work the Way In

Now try deepening the kiss by opening your mouth slightly and encourage her lips apart with your lips. Take your time, it's not a marathon, if your partner shows any signs of withdrawing, resume closed mouth kissing. But if your partner appears to be enjoying it, keep parting her lips, moving them in a slow, circular motion. The idea is to start with slow movements to open the mouth as passion intensifies, and the kisses become steamy.

The Tongue Comes into Play

French kissing is not complete until you use your tongues. You can start by tracing your partner's lips with your tongue, or inserting your tongue gently in their mouth. Be patient and try coaxing their tongue to interact with yours. The goal is to get the mouth open, so your tongues can take the passion to new levels.

Have Fun!

Once you have succeeded, you can alternatively touch your partner's tongue gently, and explore the inside of their mouth. Try alternating lips with tongue and start touching tongues against each other lightly, but going back to the lips frequently, which acts as a simulation of the sexual act itself. Once you're passionately kissing, use your tongue as a tool to explore and have fun with your partner, kissing gently, but passionately.

Don't Forget to Breathe

As silly as it might sound, don't forget to breathe! Remember that when French kissing, you will not want to run out of breath. You should be able to comfortably enjoy the moment, exploring your partner's mouth and tongue. Focus on the moment, enjoy the sensations, explore possibilities to increase the pleasure; but above all, keep up the intensity of the kiss, and show your partner just how much you love to French kiss them.

Stop Slowly

Don't just stop all at once. Gently roll back the intensity of your French kissing until you're back to those lip touching kisses, and let them trail off gradually.

If it still bothers you with the how to French kiss step by step instructions above, watch this for a clearer demonstration:

Tips for Better Kissing

Good Hygiene

Aside from having a clean mouth, you'll also want to have a clean body prior to any date. Proper hygiene includes bathing or showering, and using a good deodorant. The cleaner you are, the more irresistible you'll be for your date.

Proper Grooming

Before you apply the instructions of how to French kiss step by step, pay attention to your appearances. You don't have to wear fancy clothing, but you'll want to dress up for the occasion. Make sure whatever you wear compliments your overall appearance. Your clothes should be clean and attractive; and the more attractive you appear, the more inclined your partner will be in getting close up and personal.

Appropriate Lipstick (for Girls)

Do not overdo it, ladies! As it relates to lipstick, try using a shade that is flattering your lips, making them look kissable. A nice touch might be using lip-gloss, as long as it's not too sticky. Remember not to wear heavy or darker shades of lipstick; it just ends up making a mess of you and your partner's face.

Before the Kiss

It's important to set the stage before the kiss. You'll want to slowly and gradually ease your date into the mood. This is accomplished by exchanging loving looks, and gazing into each other's eyes. Gently stroking your partner's hair or face, caressing the back of the neck, or rubbing your partner's earlobe, sets up the very passionate French kiss.

Keep It Private

Unless you're into public displays of affection, French kisses, especially the first ones, should be in a private setting. Try setting the mood with some music, it will probably enhance the romantic moment.

Additional Tips

Things you should look out for with the how to French kiss step by step instructions:

If you're sitting on a couch or love seat, turn towards each other.

Learn to know the difference between if they're toying with you, or teasing you, by refusing to get closer.

Pull your partner closer to you using gentle pressure, but try not to be insistent or forceful.

If your partner shows any sign of resistance, slow down or stop completely.

How to french kiss

And with that, Ally convinced me to go to the new James Bond movie with Patrick and Steve, two boys from school. It was 1973. We were thirteen, and Ally desperately wanted a boyfriend.

The four of us fumbled into our seats with popcorn and cokes. I had no idea which seat to claim, so I kept moving down the aisle until Patrick stopped me.

“Do you want to sit here?” Patrick pointed to the seat next to Ally.

“Um, sure.” I let him squeeze past me.

He stepped on my foot, and it hurt. “Oh, man,” he said. “I’m real sorry, are you okay?”

I wanted to grab my poor toes, but I didn’t. “Yep,” I said, my voice high. “I’m okay.”

Patrick gave me a smile that was both grateful and apologetic.

There wasn’t much room between our seats and the row of chairs in front of us, so once Patrick sat, he kept moving around, adjusting his long legs. He looked crowded and uncomfortable.

“Do you have enough room?” I asked.

What a stupid question. Obviously he didn’t.

“Oh good. I’m good too.” I wanted to smack myself. Could I sound like a bigger idiot?

There we were, me and Ally, sandwiched between two boys, a real double date. About halfway through the movie, as Roger Moore made out with Jane Seymour, I saw Steve’s arm reach around Ally’s shoulders. I pretended not to notice, but when Steve leaned in and kissed her on the mouth, I turned my head and watched. Wow. They really looked like they knew what they were doing. I thought that Ally had never kissed a boy before, because I certainly hadn’t. Clearly I was wrong.

I glanced at Patrick and was relieved to see him focused on the movie and popping Junior Mints, unaware of what his best friend and my best friend were doing. Trying to ignore the passionate kissing taking place next to me, I shifted in my seat, but that caused me to bump into Patrick. He looked at me. Then he noticed the kissing. He leaned forward and looked as I pretended that I didn’t see him looking at what I wasn’t looking at, even though I was sort of looking, too. How mortifying. A minute later Steve and Ally left their seats and went to the back row.

“Guess they want to be alone,” he whispered, staring straight ahead.

We went back to watching the movie. Just when I was starting to relax again, Patrick reached around the back of my seat, and his hand lightly touched the skin on my upper arm. I caught my breath. A boy, a cute boy, the boy I’d been pining over since third grade, had his arm around me. My heart thumped so loudly I could hear it. Patrick smelled fresh, like soap and baby shampoo. An image of him showering popped into my head. I wondered if he could smell me, if he was imagining me taking a shower. The thought made me feel tingly and creepy at the same time.

Patrick kept his arm over my shoulder. Whenever Jane and Roger kissed, he glanced at me and smiled. One time, when his face came close to mine, I turned, and we accidentally bumped noses. Both of us laughed. Then he leaned toward me, and his lips touched mine. I had watched plenty of kissing on TV and at the movies, so I pretty much knew what to do. I moved my lips lightly against his. We lingered and kissed, and his fingers stroked my arm. I loved it. But then it stopped. Patrick pulled his arm away and returned to the movie. What was I supposed to do now? Did this mean that I was a bad kisser? Was I expected to initiate the next round of kissing? Would he? I felt lost, left in limbo, dying to know what Patrick was thinking. I sipped my coke, and stared at the screen.

Then, another kissing scene, a steamy one. Patrick’s arm went around me again, and he began giving me more of his gentle kisses, his lips cool and smooth like fresh sheets on a summer night. I closed my eyes and put my hand on the back of his neck, winding my fingers between his soft brown curls like I had seen on TV. Patrick must have interpreted my touch as encouragement, because his kisses came faster, and I tasted a hint of chocolate from the Junior Mints. I pulled away and licked my lips. Patrick looked at me, his eyes held a question.

“Chocolate,” I said.

“Yeah.” He smiled crookedly. “A chocolate kiss.”

The theater darkened more as the Bond car sped into a tunnel. I could barely see Patrick’s face, but I felt it close to mine. As our lips met again, he put his hand on my bare leg and touched my thigh lightly, hesitantly. I shivered, and goose bumps rose on the surface of my skin. I felt his hand slide smoothly up the side of my leg. Then suddenly his mouth opened and, to my horror, his tongue slipped into my mouth like a slithering serpent.

“Oh!” I stood up, knocking over a half-eaten bucket of popcorn.

“That! What? What were you doing?”

“I was kissing you,” he whispered. “I thought you liked it!”

“I did until you did, put your, you know, that…”

People turned and stared and snickered.

“I’m sorry,” Patrick said. “Just sit down, okay?”

But I couldn’t. I was too embarrassed, not to mention shocked that another person’s tongue had been in my mouth! I grabbed my sweater and ran out of the theater. I sensed that Patrick was behind me, but I never turned to look.

Later that night, Ally called. She felt sorry for me, but sorrier for Patrick. Steve told her that Patrick had gone straight home, locked himself in his room, and wouldn’t talk to anyone.

“It’s French kissing,” she explained. “You’re supposed to use your tongue.”

“Yeah, well, that’s obvious.”

I avoided Patrick for the rest of summer. I turned down swim parties and trips to the mall. I refused to hang out at the park, go to a movie, or get an ice cream at Swenson’s. I could not risk running into him, my humiliation still burning inside me like fire with an endless supply of fuel. But I thought about him constantly – his hair, his hands, his lips, and his soft, sweet, chocolate kisses.

(Do you have a “first kiss” experience that is funny, horrifying, romantic, or whatever? Please share!)