“The saddest summary of life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.”
We all have something stored in our memory banks of the past that we wish we could have done differently, or something we wish we didn’t do.
As we get older we learn and grow, but that doesn’t mean we have to regret what we did before we learned how to do things differently. If we didn’t go through those experiences, we might not have grown into the strong and knowledgeable people we are today.
What I’m proposing is that we get rid of the negative thoughts—the could haves, might haves, and should haves—and start living a life that won’t make us feel regretful. Not even at an older, wiser age.
Here is a list of things you can do to practice living life with no regrets:
1. Realize that it’s okay to make mistakes. Just make sure to learn from them, forgive yourself, and move on.
2. Make your health and wellness a top priority and always take care of yourself so you’re ready to take care of others.
3. Follow your own path, not one that others want you to follow.
4. Find the humor in life and laugh like there is no tomorrow.
5. Relax and move with the flow of life by being unafraid of change.
6. Be adventurous by trying new things and taking more risks.
7. Have more intellectual curiosity and embrace creativity.
8. Try to find happiness with as many different people as you can.
9. Think for yourself instead of letting other people’s opinions influence you too much.
10. Try not to judge people before you get to know them.
11. Be thankful for what you have now instead of thinking about what you don’t have.
12. Wish well upon everyone equally and try to admire without envy.
13. Share your happiness with others instead of hoarding it all for yourself.
14. Don’t try to change someone—love who they are now.
15. Enjoy the journey, not just the destination.
16. Know that happiness is bigger than any bank account.
17. Control negative thoughts so that they don’t contribute to the outcome of your life.
18. Use your energy wisely because spending energy complaining, worrying, or being impatient is just wasted energy.
19. Be bold. Find the courage to change things that should be changed and accept that there are some things that cannot be changed.
20. Love your work. If you don’t currently love what you do, figure out what you would love and take the first step toward that life.
21. Turn your discontent into a mystery and enjoy trying to solve it.
22. Face problems from different angles in order to find solutions.
23. Gain independence by realizing that on this earth we are all dependent upon each other.
24. Change your perspective by taking on a wider view of things.
25. Don’t waste time trying to bring disagreeable people around to liking you.
26. Become the person you would like to spend the rest of your life with.
27. Be honest with yourself and others by saying what you mean and meaning what you say.
28. Treat people with respect and compassion.
29. Live in the now by loving the present and being aware of your thoughts and actions. Think happy thoughts and speak powerful words.
30. Try not to put things off until later.
31. Never hold grudges.
32. Face your fears head on and try to do the things that you think you cannot do.
33. Spend time with people who make you happy while also not depending on other people for your own happiness.
34. Stand up for yourself and others and don’t let anyone or anything hold you back.
35. Be yourself and love who you are now.
36. Be a participant in life rather than an observer.
37. Do the things that you love to do as much as you can.
38. Write out a list of goals and achieve them by doing them step by step. Don’t give up when things get difficult.
39. Do something every day that makes you feel proud of yourself—commit random acts of kindness whenever you get the chance.
40. And always keep on moving forward.
I know it seems like a rather large list of things to take on, but you can accomplish a lot on this list by doing just one thing. For example, right now as I’m typing this I’m putting into practice at least eighteen things.
Put these things into practice and see where life takes you, without regrets. And please comment below. I’d love to read your thoughts on this.
Many people see debt as a necessary evil, but it still is possible to live—and thrive—without using debt or worrying about your credit scores. The benefits of debt-free living are easy to understand, but it’s important to know what challenges you’ll face and how to overcome them if you stop playing using credit.
Challenges of Living Without Credit
Not using credit means that you won’t have a credit history, which means you will have a low credit score. That can make it more difficult to buy things, and re-entering the world where credit scores matter can be painful if your plans change, because it takes time to build a good one.
One of the biggest challenges of the debt-free lifestyle is paying for everything with cash. It doesn’t have to be paper cash; it can be a debit card. If you’re not going to borrow, it will take more time, more savings, or both to afford major purchases.
You’ll have to save a substantial amount of money to buy a vehicle without financing it, and it will be even more difficult to buy a home. A renter may be forced to pay more upfront to demonstrate that they are a safe tenant.
How to Spend Without a Credit Card
Here are some strategies for living in our increasingly cashless society without a credit card.
You can use cash or a debit card to pay for everyday expenses, such as groceries, entertainment, or meals out. Cash makes budgeting easy if you use the envelope method to separate it by purpose, but keeping cash around is risky. A debit card linked to your checking account offers the convenience of a credit card, and you’ll only spend money you actually have.
If you’ve grown accustomed to paying monthly bills such as your cell phone, utilities, or gym memberships with a credit card, that’s an easy habit to break. Switch to online bill payments, so your bank sends funds to your biller by check or electronic transfer. Just as with a credit card, you can set things up, so the payment goes automatically. Alternatively, you can pay these bills with your debit card.
If you don’t have a checking account, you can use a prepaid debit card instead of a standard debit card. A prepaid cards is “loaded” with funds before you use it. You can swipe the card or make online bill payments out of your loaded balance. The card stops working after you use up your balance.
Debit Versus Credit Cards
Debit cards and prepaid cards are riskier for everyday spending than credit cards. If somebody steals your debit card number and racks up charges, those funds come directly out of your checking account. You are generally protected from fraud and errors, but you’ll have to notify your bank quickly for the best protection.
The real problem is that your account may temporarily get emptied, causing you to bounce payments, and that can result in a domino effect of messes to clean up. When your credit card number gets stolen, thieves spend the card issuer’s money, which gives you time to clean up everything without getting your checking account involved.
Debit cards can be problematic when the card gets swiped before the exact amount of your spending is known. That typically happens when you rent a car or hotel room or open a tab at a nightclub.
The merchant will pre-authorize your card and temporarily lock up funds in your checking account. These charges should fall off after a few days, but having numerous charges, combined with a checking account that’s running low, can cause trouble.
You may have plenty of money, but if the bank won’t let you use it, your card will be declined, and your checks will bounce. Keep an extra buffer of cash in your checking account to avoid problems, and check your available account balance regularly.
Debit Card Required
Debit cards work almost everywhere, even when an online form asks you to enter a credit card number. In rare cases, a car rental agency will require a credit card instead of a debit card to make a reservation. Find out ahead of time what cards are accepted or what the requirements are if you only have a debit card, especially if you need to rent a car.
Buying a Home
For some, the aversion to borrowing ends with buying a home. You can save up and pay cash for most things, but homes can cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, which would take decades of extreme saving for most buyers.
If you decide to get a mortgage and live a debt-free lifestyle, you’ll need to work harder than most borrowers to prove your creditworthiness, because you’ll lack a credit history.
You’ll have to get approved based on “alternative” factors instead of a traditional FICO credit score to get approved for a loan. That will limit the number of lenders who will work with you and the types of loans available. It may also result in a higher interest rate.
You’re most likely to find a loan that is guaranteed by the U.S. government, such as an FHA loan. To determine your creditworthiness, lenders will look for information about regular on-time payments you make, such as rent, utilities, and insurance premiums. Make sure you pay on time for at least 12 months before you apply for a loan.
Another important factor is the income you have available to repay a mortgage loan. When doing manual underwriting—which is what you’ll need if you don’t have traditional credit—lenders will most likely need to see that your debt-to-income ratio is less than 43%, and lower is better. As someone who is living debt-free, you are spending less than 43% of your income on expenses, which will include your mortgage payment.
It’s also helpful to have money in the bank. If you’re a debt-free saver, you’re probably there already. The more financially secure you are, the more likely you are to get approved, even without a credit history.
Lenders are looking for a sure thing, or at least as close to one as they can get. A long history of employment is helpful, because it suggests that you will continue to earn a consistent income. The industry you work in also can be a factor. Seasonal employment is less dependable, while a government job often is considered secure.
Time to Close
Without traditional credit scores, it will take even longer than normal to get a loan. Manual underwriting is a labor-intensive process, because someone must review and evaluate all of the details. That is a serious disadvantage if you’re buying in a quickly moving seller’s market where demand is high. Get started on the process as soon as possible if you live in a hot market, and long before you make an offer.
Should You Abandon Credit Entirely?
Before you ditch debt for good, know why you might want good credit, so you can make a more informed decision to do without it:
Career and Success
Life is full of challenges. Some people seem to meet every challenge with confidence, while others struggle to overcome them. Pittas especially get a sense of satisfaction from facing challenges head on—it brings a sense of accomplishment and can be very fulfilling. On some level, you actually seek challenges. Your highest self wants you to learn and grow, and life’s most effective tool toward growth is experience.
The problem is that all too often you might find yourself faced with the same challenges over and over again, and that’s when you start to lose motivation to face the issue and lose sight of the potential lesson. At that point, challenges can become problems that can spiral you into despair and frustration.
As a co-creator of your own reality, you have the ability to overcome these challenges. It is with this sense of responsibility and awareness that you can begin your journey into a higher state of consciousness where challenges are no longer challenges, but opportunities to get a glimpse of your highest self.
Here are some ways to better accept and meet your personal challenges, whatever they may be.
Face the Challenge
In many cases this is the most important step, the most obvious step, yet it is also the most often missed. People spend time looking for a way around the issue, or wallowing in despair at the enormity of the challenge, instead of facing it. Even mundane things, like a pileup of laundry or work, get ignored. Putting a challenge off doesn’t make it go away. This is true of big challenges, as well as the small ones. The most important thing you can do is face what’s in front of you head on.
Do not underestimate the power of being present. If you make a practice of facing your challenges—even in failure—with full presence and awareness, you will find most challenges are not challenges at all. Instead life’s challenges become messages from the universe. Meditation can help you cultivate silent awareness and is a good tool to help bring that focus to yourself during difficult times.
You can ask yourself questions that help you better understand the problem and how it affects you.
- Why is this a challenge?
- Do I believe that I am capable of being successful at this challenge?
- What are the possible outcomes if I succeed?
- What is the outcome if I fail?
These questions are not meant to solve the problem, rather they are meant to help bring you into fuller awareness of the challenge itself and your emotional reaction to it.
Look to Your SELF for the Solution
Others can help you arrive at your own understanding, but no one ever solves your problems for you. Even in circumstances where someone else is acting as an authority or partner, only you can decide for yourself how you will process the situation. The longer you spend searching for guidance outside of yourself, the longer you spend ignoring the problem. Asses the situation, your resources, and your abilities, and then act. Your action may include enlisting help from others, but it will be your challenge to solve. The sooner you take up the challenge, the quicker it stops being a problem.
Challenges are opportunities to grow. That growth takes place out of potentiality, your potentiality, which is infinite and highly active in every moment of life. Come to know yourself as that. You are pure potential experiencing life through what seems like limitation. Challenges are spikes in that imaginary limitation barrier that guide you to awareness. You decide: Are you limited or are you an ever-expansive growth of consciousness and love? Choose the latter, and take another look at that so-called challenge you’ve been facing.
There is a reason why certain challenges seem hard to you while others breeze right through the same situations. It’s not because they are better than you. It’s all about consciousness. Those who face challenging tasks have found a way to avoid seeing those activities as challenges.
Detach From the Outcome
Stressing about the potential outcome is often what turns a molehill into a mountain. Once you shift your focus to the thing you’re actually doing, instead of the result, the most intimidating parts of the trial start to disappear. If you simply perform the task at hand without worrying about the outcome, you have power over the situation.
Some challenges seem enormous and harsh, but if you remain centered and full of awareness, no challenge is too big to meet with power and grace.
Tune into the Boost Your Confidence program for more tips to develop trust and faith in yourself, available now in the Chopra App.
Life is full of its ups and downs. One day, you may feel like you have it all figured out. Then, in a moment’s notice, you’ve been thrown a curve ball. You’re not alone in these feelings. Everyone has to face their own set of challenges. Learning how to overcome challenges will help you stay centered and remain calm under pressure.
Everyone has their own preferences for how to face a challenge in life. However, there are a few good tips and tricks to follow when the going gets tough. Take your pick from the following list!
Photo by Rémi Walle on Unsplash
10 Ways to Overcome Challenges in Life
1. Make A Plan
While you don’t know what is going to happen in the future, you can always plan ahead. Look at the patterns in your life and see what challenges you’ve struggled with. Assess the optimal outcomes and make a plan for how you can achieve them.
If you work somewhere and can anticipate the types of challenges you may face, then you can plan ahead. This is the same for students in school. If a challenge is time management, then you can learn and plan for calendar management, for example.
2. Know You’re Not Alone
Every person in this world has their low points. Some may handle or even hide it better than others. But the truth is, whatever you are going through, there are others who have been through it too. You’re not alone. Try to reach out to your community and network. Speak your feelings and express your concerns in all settings of your life.
3. Ask For Help
You’re not alone, so you can find help. There’s no need to feel ashamed for asking for help. Whether you choose to rely on a loved one, a stranger, a mentor, or a friend, there are people who want to help you succeed.
4. Feel Your Feelings
By masking your feelings, they are not going to go away. Rather, feelings become trapped energy and can even have negative health consequences when they are ignored. Take some time to feel what you feel. This could come in the form of meditation. Or, if you’d rather write down what you feel, writing can be a therapeutic and cathartic experience.
When you feel and share your feelings, you may also be able to see your situation in a new light. This exercise could lead you to come up with novel solutions and overcome any challenge at hand.
5. Accept Support
Asking for help is only one side of the coin. On the other side of the coin, you have to be open and willing to accept support. People who come to your aid truly do care about you. Be open to receiving help when you need it.
6. Help Others
The old adage goes, “What you give is what you get.” If you’ve been through a situation or have advice for someone you know who is going through a tough time, be sure to help out! Helping others not only benefits them, but it can also help you feel happier yourself.
7. Think Big
It can be easy to let yourself think small because of the fear of failure, or even the fear of making a decision. But, to accomplish great things in life, you have to be open to taking risks. With whatever challenges may arise, always think and dream big. That way, you will achieve more than you could have ever imagined. Try not to let your thoughts get in your own way.
8. Positive Mindset
What you think becomes your reality. Train your mind to think positively. This will take both time and practice. It begins with mental awareness. You can practice awareness through mindfulness techniques and meditation. When you get good at acknowledging your thoughts and letting them pass, you can stop negative thoughts in their tracks.
9. Don’t Give Up
When a challenge arises, be it a big test in school or an upcoming running race, don’t give up! Persistence is a huge key to overcoming challenges. Giving up means that you will neither overcome the challenge nor learn from it. Power through challenges by asking for support, feeling your feelings, and making a plan to work through it.
10. Work Smart, Not Hard
Generally, there is more than one way to get something done. However, there’s always just one optimal way or best way of doing it. To work smarter rather than harder, start by working backward. Outline and define your goal. Then, plan the process for how to get there. Perform research to see how others who have come before you have done it. Take count of your own skills and ideas for how you may be able to do it better. Then, stick to your path and get to work!
Photo by madison lavern on Unsplash
A 4-Step Method for Overcoming Challenges
Want to try a technique for overcoming challenges that Buddha himself once taught? This four-step method could help you a lot!
- Accept and Let Go: Accept where you are now and what you have. This is your life, at this time. While it’s temporary, accepting it will help you to let go of stress, anxiety, and fear. Meditation is one of the best ways to learn and practice acceptance.
- Observe and Decide: When you face a particular challenge, take a step away from your feelings to make a plan. While it’s important to still feel your feelings, when deciding how to act, you want to be objective as possible.
- Face Fears and Act: Taking action is one of the biggest steps in overcoming challenges. It’s likely that a big part of whatever you’re facing feels like a challenge because you have an underlying fear. Try to recognize and define what you fear in the situation. Then, you can act to mitigate that fear.
- Practice Gratitude: Ultimately, we tend to exist in our comfort zones. So, when something new happens or is presented, we may feel like it’s hard to deal with. By practicing gratitude, you can reframe your definition of a challenge. You will also be happier overall in your present moment.
The Bottom Line
Learning how to deal with challenges takes time, persistence, and a positive attitude. No matter your life situation, the hard times will happen. But, with the right mindset and practice, you will be able to overcome them every time and grow in the process!
In this Article
- Anxiety and Stress
- Relationship Health
- Immune System
- Vaginal Walls and Lubrication
- Prostate Cancer
People go through dry spells in the bedroom for all kinds of reasons. Maybe theyвЂ™re busy, or maybe theyвЂ™re single. Or they might just decide they want a break.
If that break goes on long enough, though, it can have an effect on your body and some parts of your life. But itвЂ™s important to remember that thereвЂ™s no вЂњrightвЂќ amount for everyone. WhatвЂ™s key is that you find what works best for you.
Anxiety and Stress
If you donвЂ™t have sex with your partner often, that may make you feel less connected to them, which can mean you donвЂ™t talk about your feelings much or get a lot of support in managing day-to-day stressors.
And sex makes your body release hormones, like oxytocin and endorphins, that can help you manage the effects of stress. Oxytocin has the added benefit of helping you sleep.
Research is in the early stages, but some studies have shown that people who have sex often are better at recalling memories. And there are signs that sex can help your brain grow neurons and work better in general.
Regular sex helps you feel emotionally close to your partner, which opens the door to better communication. Couples who have sex more often tend to say theyвЂ™re happier than those who get less of it.
But it doesnвЂ™t have to happen every day — once a week seems to be enough. This seems to be true no matter your age or gender, or how long youвЂ™ve been in the relationship.
Regular sex can help your body fight off illness, so having it less often might lead to more colds and the like. In one study, college students who had sex one to two times per week were shown to have higher levels of a certain antibody (called immunoglobulin A) that plays an important role in your immune system.
Vaginal Walls and Lubrication
If youвЂ™re a woman whoвЂ™s gone through menopause, you have another reason to keep having sex. Without regular intercourse, your vagina can tighten and its tissues can get thinner and be more likely to get injured, tear, or even bleed during sex. This can be so uncomfortable that women with these symptoms avoid having sex, which can make it worse.
Changes related to menopause, such as vaginal dryness and irritation, can be treated with lubricants, moisturizers, or low-dose estrogen.
For men, how often they have sex may be linked to their chances of prostate cancer, but the evidence is mixed. Some experts think that sex might actually raise your odds, by possibly exposing you to sexually transmitted diseases that lead to inflammation.
But in one large study of almost 30,000 men, those who said they ejaculated more than 21 times a month on average had lower chances of prostate cancer during their lifetimes, compared with those who ejaculated four to seven times a month.
Anxiety.org: вЂњWhy Having More Sex May Lead to a Healthier Mind and Body.вЂќ
Kinsey Institute Research: вЂњFrequent Sex is Linked to Better Memory.вЂќ
Society for Personality and Social Psychology: вЂњCouples Who Have Sex Weekly Are Happiest.вЂќ
Psychological Reports: вЂњSexual Frequency and Salivary Immunoglobulin A (IgA).вЂќ
The North American Menopause Society: вЂњChanges in the Vagina and Vulva,вЂќ вЂњVaginal and Vulvar Comfort,” вЂњLubricants, Moisturizers, and Low-dose Vaginal Estrogen.вЂќ
Mayo Clinic: вЂњErectile Dysfunction.вЂќ
American Journal of Medicine: вЂњRegular Intercourse Protects Against Erectile Dysfunction: Tampere Aging Male Urologic Study.вЂќ
Johns Hopkins Medicine: вЂњDoes Sexual Activity Affect My Risk of Cancer?вЂќ
International Society for Sexual Medicine: вЂњWhat is the вЂњNormalвЂќ Frequency of Sex?”
Hello! I am a college student who is about to turn 19. So, I am in a hard time right now. Because, my daily routine is really bad. And everyone know how a bad routine can affect a person. It makes me physically and mentally tired. I am living a depressing life and want to get from it. I don’t have a proper time to sleep. I got to bed at somewhere between 2am to 3 am. I study software development and I love programming. Also, I like chess. I try to improve at both programming and chess. And I also have to study what I study at college. Whenever, I try to study I get distracted and lost my mind. I might be a addicted to social media. I just open reedit or YouTube and spend a lot of time there. And when I realize I didn’t do anything good this day(Like study programming, chess and other things college) and I try to push myself to do something. And it is really awful. I want to take a break but also want to fix the things that I didn’t do. I wake up at almost 12pm and eat food only two times a day(most of the time). I am skinny and physically week. I think I know my weakness. But, cant fix it.
These are the thing that I want to do
Sleep more than 8 hours.
Eat more food(I want to take a weight gain diet).
Study the things at college. And when I get more positive menially I want to study programming(there are many things that I want to learn which they don’t teach at the college) and chess.
Get more sunlight.
Work out for 20 minutes.
You might want to ask the question “You know your how to fix you life and why don’t you do it?”. The thing is I have been trying to fix it for almost 1 and half month. Everyday I try to fix it and end up with the same depressing life. I don’t know how to fix it. I need to get out from this depressing life. Please give me some advice to fix this thing. I know most of my weakness and don’t know how to fix it. And it makes it even bad. It’s like I know that I am living the most depressing life possible can’t do anything about it.
I don’t know if this is post suitable of r/simpleliving. I even don’t know what this subreddit is about. I thought I can advice about my depressing life. Sorry if my post doesn’t fit the idea of this subreddit.
Also English is not my main language. Sorry if there is any mistake.
Sinner to Saint
- 66,416 hits
- IMPORTANT DATES IN CHRISTIANITY
- IMPORTANT LESSONS LEARNED IN LIFE
- LEADERSHIP PRINCIPLES
- QUEST FOR TRUTH: DIFFERENT RELIGIONS AND BELIEF SYSTEMS
- QUOTE FOR THE WEEK
- WHAT’S ON MY MIND
Life without Christ is disastrous. Check your soul and you will see it is true. We all know this deep down that there is something more for us beyond ourselves and his world.
Here are ten reasons living without Jesus doesn’t work:
1. You need to be perfect to meet God’s standard and you can’t even get close by your own efforts.
We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment. We all fade like a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away. Isaiah 64:6
2. You waste your whole life pursuing stuff and people that never brings you real joy and peace.
For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? Mark 8:36-37
3. You are trying to find purpose in life without ever connecting with the only one who can give you real purpose. (It is like playing chess without the king on the board.)
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1-2
4. Being religious in order to clean up is about as beneficial as putting perfume and nice clothes on a corpse and calling it full of life.
Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness. Matthew 23:27-28
5. Your enemy is stronger than you and can beat you down every time without divine intervention.
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8
6. You were made to bring glory to God and you are trying to give it to someone or something else and it’s making you miserable inside.
Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth- everyone who is called by my name whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.” Isaiah 43:6-7
7. You place all your emphasis on living it up for the 70 years or so on earth and give no emphasis or preparation for the eternity you will have left after this life.
Set your mind on things above and not on earthly things. Colossians 3:2
… yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. James 4:14
8. You are blind, unaware, ignorant and deceived and you think you can figure out your meaning on this earth on your own.
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5
9. You will face a terrible judgment by the most powerful judge of all time who has overwhelming proof against you and can give the most devastating punishment and you are willing to take a chance that it will all go in your favor without any real reason to believe so except that you want it to be ok.
For the wages of sin is death… Romans 6:23
Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. Anyone whose name was not found written in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire. Revelation 20:14-15
10. You think you are pretty good compared to most of the world when your wickedness just looks different than yours.
For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23
Truth is only found in Jesus and only when we have Jesus do we really know what it is to live.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10