How to respond to an insult with comebacks

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

If you are dealing with critics and haters, try not to listen. Don’t shrink your greatness. You can’t control what other people think or say about you. Whatever you do, someone will judge you for it—30 percent will love it, 30 percent will hate it, and 30 percent won’t care. Try your best not to take it personally and have as little interaction with the hater as you possibly can.

No matter what you do, someone is going to judge you for it. You could be the most beautiful person on the planet, and someone will call you unattractive. Some people sit on the sidelines of life criticizing other people, yet they themselves have nothing to contribute to the world.

What you can control is what you do every day towards reaching your goals. Keep following your unique path and journey. Make your hater your motivator.

Be the best you can be in your life and just keep going. The hater will probably complain and hate on someone else next week.

If people are giving you a hard time, try one of our rudest comebacks ever to shut them up.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks


Ever feel like you don’t know what to say to the difficult people in your life? Grab our FREE starter guide, so you know not only what to say- but how to say it!

Top Ten Rudest comebacks Ever

  1. You’re like a bag of Pampers. Self absorbed and full of shit.
  2. I would tell you to go f*ck yourself but I’m pretty sure you’d be disappointed.
  3. Since you know it all, you should know when to shut the f*ck up.
  4. Yep, no doubt about it, your father should have pulled out earlier.
  5. I swear some men were conceived by anal sex. There is no way being that much of an asshole is natural.
  6. I’m not a proctologist but I sure know an asshole when I see one.
  7. I hear there’s a new app called a sense of humour. Download it bitch!
  8. You’re like a plunger, you like bringing up old shit.
  9. I don’t sugar coat shit, I’m not Willy Wonka.
  10. Acting like a dick won’t make yours any bigger.

Dwayne Johnson had to deal with his fair share of haters and critics

It is hard to believe that Dwayne Johnson, “The Rock” ever had haters. He is now 229 lbs, 6’5 and pure muscle. But it wasn’t always that way, you would think Dwayne had the perfect life but he has personally faced some real challenges and some big critics along his journey.

I was always the new kid so that made me a target,” he says. “We moved so much that we lived in fourteen different states because my dad was on the road which was unsettling and disorientating. I used to get into a lot of fights. I wouldn’t start them, but you know when you’re the new kid …”

When Johnson was in his early 20s, he battled depression after he was cut from the Calgary Stampeders, a Canadian Football League. He was also passed over for the NFL, it was a very difficult time for him, he says it was his rock bottom.

I had just seven bucks in my pocket, I had nowhere to live and I had to move back into my parents’ house and that was a low blow. I was lost, I didn’t know where I was going to go, what was going to come next because I couldn’t see a future. In hindsight it was also the best thing to happen to me because I learned during that period no one was going to hand me a life, I wasn’t going to get back on my feet feeling sorry for myself, I had to pick myself up and keep going and fighting and grasp and claw and scratch at every opportunity that came my way.

Dwayne’s grandfather was a wrestler, so he decided to get into the family business and joined the WWE. He got off to a rocky start, during Wrestle-mania he was booed by 20,000 fans chanting, “Rocky sucks.” He stood up to the fans, but he realized the valuable lesson to just be himself.” About a month later, I was the hottest heel in the company and things were on fire,” he says. “And the greatest lesson about that is be you. … The most powerful thing you can be is yourself.”

Dwayne started acting in 2001 and by 2017 he was named the highest paid actor in Hollywood.

January 5, 2020 Updated March 9, 2021

Sometimes when we’re peeved, our minds can go to some pretty dark places. If you can dig up some dark humor while you’re there, you’ll feel much better! We’ve compiled a list of good roasts and comebacks to mutter under your breath the next time someone pisses you off. Whether you’ve gotta deal with kids who just won’t put their crap away or need an office joke for that coworker who drives you crazy, there’s something on this list for every situation. Repeat as many times as you need until you no longer give AF.

Better yet, why wait until confrontation arises to get a whirl out of these? There’s no better roast than a roast between good friends, and this is most definitely a list from which you can bounce off each other. And if there are no friends available, you can always pull up a chair and get practicing for your special appearance on an episode of Comedy Central Roast. Or pretend you’re on an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race and you just spit back an already iconic burn. A girl can dream, right?

Reminder: While we all need to blow off steam from time to time (moms especially!), bullying or being mean isn’t cool. Save these roasting jokes and comebacks for the privacy of your own home, or for people who’ll understand that they’re just that — jokes. After all, their hilarity will be much better appreciated that way.

Read on to learn some of the best roasts and insults that will get you through a day where you don’t feel like being as sweet as a Georgia peach.

1. You’re the reason God created the middle finger.

2. You’re a grey sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.

3. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.

4. You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.

5. Light travels faster than sound, which is why you seemed bright until you spoke.

6. We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, we’ve been married for 10 years.

7. Your kid is so annoying he makes his Happy Meal cry.

8. You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail.

9. Your secrets are always safe with me. I never even listen when you tell me them.

10. I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.

11. I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.

12. I only take you everywhere I go just so I don’t have to kiss you goodbye.

13. Hold still. I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.

14. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! I still have mine.

15. Your face makes onions cry.

16. The only way my husband would ever get hurt during an activity is if the TV exploded.

17. You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.

18. It’s impossible to underestimate you.

How to respond to an insult with comebacksPexels

19. Her teeth were so bad she could eat an apple through a fence.

20. I’m not insulting you; I’m describing you.

21. I’m not a nerd; I’m just smarter than you.

22. Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job.

23. Your face is just fine, but we’ll have to put a bag over that personality.

24. You bring everyone so much joy… when you leave the room.

25. I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.

26. Don’t worry about me. Worry about your eyebrows.

27. You are the human version of period cramps.

28. If you’re going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty.

29. You are like a cloud. When you disappear, it’s a beautiful day.

30. I’d rather treat my baby’s diaper rash than have lunch with you.

31. Don’t worry — the first 40 years of childhood are always the hardest.

32. I may love to shop, but I will never buy your bull.

33. I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of your nostrils like that?


35. “Check your lipstick before you come for me.” — Naomi Smalls, RuPaul’s Drag Race

36. “It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’” — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race

37. “Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that comes out of your mouth?” — Jamie McGuire, Beautiful Oblivion

38. “Go back to Party City, where you belong!” — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race

39. “Where’d you get your outfits, girl, American Apparently Not?” — Trixie Mattel, RuPaul’s Drag Race

40. “Impersonating Beyoncé is not your destiny, child.” — RuPaul, RuPaul’s Drag Race

41. “Don’t get bitter, just get better.” — Alyssa Edwards, RuPaul’s Drag Race

42. Child, I’ve forgotten more than you ever knew.

43. You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.

44. I know you are, but what am I?

45. I see no evil, and I definitely don’t hear your evil.

46. You have miles to go before you reach mediocre.

47. When you look in the mirror, say hi to the clown you see in there for me, would ya?

48. Bye, hope to see you never.

49. Complete this sentence for me: “I never want to see you ____!”

50. Remember that time you were saying that thing I didn’t care about? Yeah… that is now.

52. N’Sync said it best: “BYE, BYE, BYE.”

53. Wish I had a flip phone so I could slam it shut on this conversation.

54. How many licks till I get to the interesting part of this conversation?

55. Wow, your maker really didn’t waste time giving you a personality, huh?

You’ve probably seen or heard about how some young people use the slang “ok, boomer” online. Sometimes, they use it in person when responding to others, and some people are wondering what the phrase means.

You’re probably wondering about the possible comebacks to that saying; you can use the following comebacks described below in case someone decides to get cheeky and say “ok, boomer” to you.

It’s not as if your grandson/granddaughter is going to let you in on the secret, and they likely won’t give you any clever comebacks. Luckily, you have this article to help you.

Before we get to the comebacks for “ok, boomer,” we’ve got to establish what it means first. This way, you’ll be able to pick the most appropriate comeback for the situation:

What does “ok, boomer” mean?

“Ok, boomer” is a phrase that the younger generation is using to dismiss older people.

This is usually a response to some of the old ideologies that the younger generation deems harmful to society, and it is used especially when someone of your age is aggressive or ignorant to the changes in society.

For instance, someone of your generation may argue that millennials and generation Z are lazy or have misplaced priorities, especially with regards to homeownership or going to college.

However, in reality, it is much harder now for young people because things are very expensive and more complicated.

The response, “ok, boomer” is a way to say, “I am not going to argue with you because you are stuck in your old ways.”

Since it has become so popular, a lot of people are saying it as a joke, which means that they do not wish to hurt anyone’s feelings or discriminate.

Other times, it is used to be blatantly disrespectful to the older generation, and it is used for more than just trolling; it actually borders on bullying at times, especially on the Internet.

It is up to you to analyze the situation and decipher whether or not the person is joking. This is the only way that you can come up with good comebacks for “ok, boomer.”

Five comebacks for “ok, boomer” when someone says it at work

The workplace is no place for age discrimination, and if that is what your coworker is doing, you should notify your HR representative.

Otherwise, you can use a clever response to show that your feelings aren’t hurt.

Here are five appropriate comebacks for “ok, boomer” in the workplace.

01 “Okay, mental illness – I mean millennial.”

You’re basically calling the person who said it dumb or crazy. It lets him/her know that the insult wasn’t smart or effective. It shows that he/she should go back to the drawing board and find another way to be rude.

02 “Wow, coming from the generation that eats tide pods and can’t do taxes?”

This is good to use on a young coworker with whom you are friendly. It shows that you are “in-the-know.” You are showing that being older means that you are smarter than your younger colleague.

03 “I’m booming in the bank, how about you?”

The chances are that you have a lot more money in your savings’ account, and you probably have more than the young people in your office.

For starters, you probably made a couple of good investments over the years, and you likely have a senior position in the office. Consequently, you have managed to accumulate more wealth during your lifetime.

When you say this, the coworker who said it will be reminded of who he/she is dealing with!

04 “I thought you were supposed to be the tolerant generation.”

This is the generation of greater acceptance and tolerance of others, no matter their race, sexual orientation, gender, class, or level of education. So, it’s surprising to see how dismissive they can be of generational differences when it comes to older generations.

It reminds your coworker that he/she should be more supportive, and that he/she isn’t being very nice.

05 [Say nothing]

Sometimes, the best response is no response.

By not responding, you are showing maturity, and you are acting like the “bigger” person. It may make your coworker feel ashamed of his/her childish behavior.

If the coworker continues to be disrespectful, you can always file a complaint with your HR department.

You will not be at fault because you did not engage him/her in the exchange of hurtful remarks.

Five comebacks for ok boomer when a stranger says it in person or online

Some strangers are nice, but others have lousy lives; this means they will try to disrespect you for no reason at all.

If you come face-to-face with one of those strangers, the way you respond to them will determine how they treat you and others in the future.

When you’re online, having a clever comeback for this saying may also score you some points with others who are online.

Here are five comebacks for this saying that you can use when a stranger says it:

06 “I think you have me mistaken with your mother/father.”

This is best used on millennials because their parents may come from the Baby Boomer generation. This will definitely make him/her second guess calling anyone that again.

07 “The jerk store called. They’re all out of you.”

This is a classic comeback. The best part is that you can use it when they don’t say “ok, boomer.” You are simply saying that the person is being a huge jerk.

08 “I’m not even a boomer genius!”

You can use this when the person calls you a “boomer,” and you are much younger than that. It might make him/her feel stupid, especially if you’re a millennial like he/she is.

09 “I hope these Internet points can pay off your student loan!”

Often, people who troll others online are mean on the Internet only, and they do it for “likes” or in other words “internet points.”

You are letting the troll know that what he/she said isn’t worth taking seriously, and being negative isn’t going to help his/her life in any way.

Plus, the running joke is that millennials are drowning in debt, and they aren’t able to afford the lifestyle that a “boomer” can.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Some people think they are just proud when in reality they come across as boastful and over the top when they brag about their accomplishments, money, or material possessions.

Most braggers are insecure and feel the need to inflate their ego to appear bigger in front of their peers. People who are confident about whom they really are don’t feel the need to show off and seek attention and approval from others.

I saw a humble brag post on Facebook recently. A mom posted her son’s straight-A report card as a post. It was in such bad taste. A report card is a personal matter, and sharing it publicly with others is uncouth. Next, the bragging mom will be sharing her work reviews or yearly bonus on Facebook.

If their bragging exceeds the limit beyond which you can put up with, here are a few snappy comebacks to stop the bragger in their tracks.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks


Ever feel like you don’t know what to say to the difficult people in your life? Grab our FREE starter guide, so you know not only what to say- but how to say it!

What to say to a bragger

  1. Do you ever get off Facebook long enough to live the life you keep bragging about?
  2. Why don’t you show more confidence and less arrogance?
  3. Being humble shows how confident you are, bragging only shows how insecure you pretend not to be.
  4. Wow, I bet you even fart glitter.
  5. May your life be as great as you pretend it is on Facebook.
  6. No matter how big your car is, how recent your car is, or how big your bank account is our graves will always be the same size. Stay humble.
  7. I love hearing you show off.
  8. I just want to let you know it’s possible to do X, and not brag about it on Facebook.
  9. If you are really good at something you don’t have to brag about it yourself. Other people will do that for you.
  10. I call bullshit!

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

More top ten comeback lists you might like

  • Top ten comebacks for for know it alls
  • Top ten comebacks for haters
  • More comebacks you might like

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing with someone who brags? Share them in the comments below.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks


Ever feel like you don’t know what to say to the difficult people in your life? Grab our FREE starter guide, so you know not only what to say- but how to say it!

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

1. Rednecks

Variations: “Did you do a special course in being ignorant…or did you just pick it up around the trailerpark?”
“Wow…it’s like some law of biology or something: people with small minds always have incredibly big mouths.”
“Has anyone seen any news reports about a village missing their idiot…I think I just found him.”


The best thing to do with transphobic comments is to ignore them and keep on walking: why waste your time on assholes? As Sun Tsu said…

The battle not fought is the battle truly won!

Okay, he didn’t say that…but you know what I mean.

However, sometimes – at the school dining room or the office water cooler – you’re effectively cornered. If you say nothing then you come off as weak…and the comments are likely to continue. Today, therefore, I’d like to give you some comebacks to transphobic insults.

2. Insults re: womanhood

Here we have something a little less highbrow and a little more below the belt. If he insults your womanhood then go for his manhood (Not literally! Fuck it…on second thoughts…rip that thing off and feed it to the pigs! (Ew…did I really just say that?”)

3. I would tell you to go fuck yourself but I’m pretty sure you’d be disappointed.

4. Acting like a dick won’t make yours any bigger.

5. Making them feel bad

Okay, I’ll admit… I wouldn’t hold out long for a transphobe to suddenly feel bad, but somethimes you need a comeback that’s not quite so aggressive.

6. Transphobic responses: not interested in your opinion, beeeeaaaatch!


1. If you’re waiting for me to care, you better pack a lunch. It’s gonna be a while.

7. Know what’s funny? Not you, so shut up!

8. I’m sorry, I didn’t order a glass of your opinion.

9. I’m sorry…I think you mistook me for someone who gives a shit!

And now let’s finish this little tutorial with my personal favorite.

10. Wow…your asshole must get jealous with all the shit that comes out of your mouth!

Okay, girls…ciao ciao… and if you wanna refute transphobic claims about transwomanhood, I recommend you read Felix’s excellent little book.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Do not pay attention to author boxes until September when we fix our post attribution problem.

Online commenting trolls have been the bane of civil internet users since the beginning of the web. Here’s how to best deal with them.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Online trolls have been the bane of rational, civil internet users since the beginning of the web.

It turns out, when you give certain people the shield of anonymity to hide behind in the form of a computer screen, things get ugly.

Internet trolls started popping out of the woodwork as early as the ’90s, when online discussion boards, comment threads, and groups were just beginning.

Trolls exist to inflame any type of discussion (back in the day, “flaming” meant igniting a personal, vindictive attack on someone simply because they didn’t share your views).

In other words, trolls like to be jerks for the sake of being jerks. They don’t care if they’re wrong or right, they just want to make others angry for the fun of it.

Sometimes, trolling can even escalate to death threats, bullying, and psychologically-damaging harassment, as seen in this tale of a brand social media manager:

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

To this day, trolls emerge from the dank recesses of their troll caves to stir up trouble in discussions, on social media, and anywhere they can make people mad.

For the rest of us, there are ways to fight back and maintain civility, friendly discourse, and fun in our online communities – not in spite of the trolls, but in direct opposition to everything they stand for.

Let’s look at how to defeat internet trolls.

1. Are You in Charge? Make a ‘No Trolls’ Policy

If the platform belongs to you (e.g., it’s your social media profile, your blog, or your discussion board), you can and should institute a “no trolling” policy.

These are guidelines that let every single person who interacts on your platform know that trolling behavior will not be tolerated, and what will happen to those who do troll (will they be banned? will their comments get deleted?).

This comment policy from Content Marketing Institute is a great example:

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Make sure you write your policy in clear terms and post it on your site or platform. Link to it as needed so people know the rules.

2. No Moderators? Get Some

If you’re having a troll problem, moderation can go a long way toward keeping the issue under control.

For example, if you have a sprawling blog with hundreds (or thousands!) of blog posts, there’s no way you can monitor that by yourself.

Enlisting a team of moderators to vet comments and deal with violators of your guidelines (see tip #1) will help you encourage a positive, welcoming atmosphere and keep those trolls in their caves.

If you don’t have the resources for moderators, there are tools out there for every type of platform:

  • Facebook has comment moderation tools for your Page.
  • YouTube has options for adding comment moderators, turning comments on and off, and live chat/comment filters.
  • Twitter has options to report abusive behavior. So does Instagram (IG also has a helpful article on how to address abuse on their platform).
  • WordPress has comment moderation tools if trolls are plaguing your blog.
  • Other blog comment moderation tools include IntenseDebate and Disqus.

3. For the Love of Pete, Ignore the Trolls

The M.O. of any troll is to get attention. To quickly put out their fire, one of the best ways to deal with them is to ignore them.

I know this is hard, especially if the troll is posting offensive, abusive, or hateful comments. You don’t want to condone this behavior, but at the same time, a troll usually posts this way just to get a reaction from someone. Give them that reaction, and the troll wins.

Don’t waste your time arguing with a troll – it’s exactly what they want.

Sometimes the best thing to do is quietly delete the comment and move on. After all, actions speak louder than words.

4. If You Can’t Ignore Them, Call Them on Their B.S.

Sometimes, ignoring a troll just isn’t an option.

Thankfully, a troll is not out making logical arguments. They aren’t masters of debate. They just enjoy stirring the pot.

If you can, calmly ask them to back up what they’re saying with facts. Usually, they’ll have none, and will lose steam pretty quickly once you deflate their “argument.”

5. Make Your Social Profile(s) Friends-Only

This one is pretty clear-cut.

If you don’t want random trolls posting comments and spewing hate on your social profiles, you can block those people, make your accounts friends-only, and screen everyone who follows you.

On Twitter, you’ll find the setting to make your account private under More >> Settings >> Privacy and safety >> Protect your Tweets.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

Your tweets will only be visible to people who follow you and people you approve.

You can also block people right inside their post or comment.

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

This is definitely time-consuming, but could be a good option for people who are dealing with out-of-control trolls who won’t stop.

6. Be Unexpectedly Kind

A troll posts with the expectation of stirring up anger and arguments. If you ignore the content of their comment and instead respond with kindness, they won’t know what to do. It’s like pouring water on a lit fuse.

This example from actress Gabourey Sidibe’s Instagram shows what I mean – she responded to messages of hate with love and kindness, which stopped a troll in their tracks:

How to respond to an insult with comebacks

7. Respond with Humor, Then Move On

Another way to thwart a troll?

Respond with humor instead of the expected anger or indignation. They won’t know what to do with themselves.

As you can see, J.K. Rowling does this flawlessly. Lesson learned.

[email protected] I’d type a longer retort, but these diamond buttons really hurt my fingers.

To Thwart a Troll, Take the High Road

Truly, the only way to destroy a troll is to rise above the fray.

Don’t stoop to their level – it’s exactly what they’re out to get you to do.

Internet trolls want anger. They want big reactions. They want drama.

If you can, take the high road. Ignore them. Delete their comments. Block them. Respond with kindness or humor – something they’re not expecting.

Maybe, just maybe, we can make the internet a better place, one interaction at a time.

More Resources:

Image Credits

All screenshots taken by author, August 2019

When someone tells you to shut up, it might catch you off guard, and you might not be able to come up with any witty comebacks right away. Doesn’t that just suck?

When you have snappy comebacks for your friends who are roasting you, or for a bully, they will think twice the next time they want to tell you to shut up.

Here are the snappy comebacks to shut up that will work every time.

Funny and playful comebacks to shut up

When a friend or family member tells you to shut up, chances are it’s in a playful manner. Here are some funny and playful comebacks to shut up that will get them back good.

01 “Awww, are you having a bad day?”

In a situation where someone tells you to shut up out of anger, it is best to respond in a way that makes you look like the bigger person. This playful response pokes fun at the situation and taunts the aggressor.

02 “I will not be silenced!”

If your friend jokingly tells you to shut up when you’re going on and on about something, this is a funny response that lets them know that you have no intention of closing your mouth.

03 “Make me.”

This is a good response for friends, family, and your lover. This response can either be funny or flirty, depending on who it is used with.

04 “Your wish is my command.”

When shut up is not meant offensively, this response is perfect because it lets the speaker know that there aren’t any hard feelings. Where it is intended offensively, this response can prevent the situation from escalating.

05 “Roses are red, violets are blue. I have 5 fingers and the middle one’s for you.”

Instead of flipping someone off, you can use this twistedly classy response to let the person know that you aren’t going to shut up and that they should buzz off.

06 “If you don’t wanna hear me, cover your ears.”

This is a good response to let someone know that if they don’t like what you’re saying, they should leave because you aren’t going to stop speaking any time soon.

07 “I have the right to remain silent but not the ability.”

This is funny a take on the rights an officer reads to someone who is being arrested. This tells the speaker to buzz off and stop trying to police your freedom of speech.

08 “I cant. That would give you too much time to talk crap.”

This option is best used on a friend. It shows that you aren’t bothered by what they have just said.

A delicious way to deter wolf-whistlers? Photograph: Roger Tooth for the Guardian Photograph: Roger Tooth/ Roger Tooth for the Guardian

A delicious way to deter wolf-whistlers? Photograph: Roger Tooth for the Guardian Photograph: Roger Tooth/ Roger Tooth for the Guardian

Last modified on Tue 8 Aug 2017 20.16 BST

W hen you experience sexism or sexual harassment, it’s common to feel a wave of emotions wash over you – fear, anger, embarrassment, shame, and often shock or panic. It’s often incredibly difficult to respond in the heat of the moment, and victims frequently report the frustration of feeling frozen. Sometimes you think of a witty comeback hours later and wish you’d had it at the tip of your tongue in time.

Let’s be very clear – it is never a victim’s duty or responsibility to shout back. We won’t solve any kind of sexism by telling the people experiencing it to react in a certain way, we’ll stop it by preventing the perpetrators from doing it in the first place. Often, it’s not safe to respond, particularly if you are isolated, or fear the situation could escalate. But for those times when you do wish you had a quick comeback, the Twitter followers of the Everyday Sexism Project shared a deluge of wonderful, witty responses this week.

Some were delightfully cunning.

@EverydaySexism when I get harassed I always pretend I didn’t hear & say “what?” The more they have to repeat the sillier they sound.

@EverydaySexism “A woman’s place is in the kitchen” you know what you’re right. Lemme grab a knife.

@EverydaySexism guy makes orgasm noise at me as I walk past. Me: “that will probably be the only time you ever hear that noise in your life”

@EverydaySexism a guy kept harrassing me for my phone number so I gave him the number of another sexist, figured they’d have a lot in common

And some were direct and to the point.

@EverydaySexism Someone bleeped at me from a car as I was striding down the road. I yelled “I AM A WOMAN NOT A TRAFFIC JAM”.

@EverydaySexism Man: “Nice tits.” Me: “If you’re going to be a sexist pig at least be accurate. I have fantastic breasts.” Silence.

Some favoured actions over words.

@everydaysexism 5yo daughter got told by a 7yo boy at the park that ‘boys are best’. She promptly out performed him on monkey bars.

Some whipped out their secret weapons.

@EverydaySexism two French men on tube discussing me in Fr: “She’s far too tall [6’+] for a woman”. Me: “Oui, elle parle français en plus”

@EverydaySexism Managed to stop white van full of men mid-catcall by shoving a big powdery donut into my mouth then smiling with mouth full

Others showcased wit and wordplay.

@EverydaySexism Bloke: ‘you’re a bit too thin for me’. Me: ‘that’s lucky because you’re a bit too thick for me’.

@EverydaySexism MAN: “Ive got the F, C and K, all I need is U” ME: “I’ve got the B, Y and E, so I don’t need U”

Some were direct and to the point.

@EverydaySexism Him: “Look darlin, I don’t mean to hassle you but…” Me: “WELL THEN DON’T HASSLE ME.” . Then he got aggressive #charmer

@EverydaySexism Guy on train after I asked him to move his bag off seat: “Why don’t you grab my cock?” Me: “I didn’t bring any tweezers.”

Some played the long game.

@EverydaySexism Dealing with a complaint, person didn’t like amount I offered. “I want to speak to your manager, and make sure it’s . 1/3

@EverydaySexism not some woman”, “my boss is a woman”, “what about her boss is the reply”, “She is too” I replied . 2/3

@EverydaySexism he stated “I’ll complain to the director if I have to”. “Erm, not sure what she’d have to say”. He hung up!

Others were as sharp as nails.

@EverydaySexism Male colleague: “Don’t mind her, she’s on her period.” Me: “If I had to bleed to find you annoying, I’d be anaemic.”

@EverydaySexism A friend heard a guy shout ‘Sit on my face!’ at a girl who replied ‘Why, is your nose bigger than your dick?’ AMAZING!

@EverydaySexism New job,1st meeting, only woman, suit asks where’s the coffee? Reply Don’t know, but when you find it mine’s white no sugar

And some really turned the tables.

@EverydaySexism flashed at on a bus when I was 19. Snorted and said I’d seen more meat on a butcher’s apron. Flasher got off bus head low

@EverydaySexism On train home guy rubs my bum. I grab hand, lift it in the air & say “has anyone lost a hand? I found this one on my arse!”

@EverydaySexism ‘cor look at the tits on that!’ ‘Yes, well at least one of us has something worth shouting about’.

@EverydaySexism Last time a man called me a bitch for ignoring his unwelcome advances, I barked at him loudly & repeatedly until he ran away

Some came from awesome male allies.

@EverydaySexism Ran up excitedly to car filled with dudes after they hooted at my friends. They sped away.

Another recent fave from a man: “Apparently the answer to ‘are you a legs man or a tits man’ isn’t ‘sorry I’m not a sexist'”

And others came from men who had experienced sexism themselves.

@EverydaySexism I’m 6’7. drunk woman grabbed me and said “is ‘everything’ in proportion?” I said “sadly not. If it was I would be 7’7”

But my personal favourite was just sheer kick-ass comedy gold.

@EverydaySexism A man once pointed out loudly that I have huge boobs. I looked down at them and screamed like I’d never noticed them before